Date night, those are long forgotten words in our marriage, especially after having kids. We tried having date nights, but it just didn’t work out because we didn’t make it a priority. This year, I’m determined to have more date nights. Another thing that didn’t motivate me to plan date nights was being the only one planning. Not that I hated it or it was burdensome, I just felt like it was a chore. I think I have to change my perspective on it as well as enlist the hubby’s help.
Leng and I agreed to have weekly date nights, but he would have to plan out the dates too, which included finding a sitter and planning out the night. The hardest part for him will be looking for a babysitter. Leng’s not from Georgia, he grew up in FL and moved to SC before we got married. I, on the other hand, lived here for about 15 years, so I have girlfriends and family here that can watch them. Leng knows them too, but I think for him, it’s awkward to ask them for babysitting, but I think this will be an opportunity for him to also make dating a priority for us.
We agreed that each of us would plan a date every other week, which gives us time to find a sitter, plan and budget for the date. I suggested that we could do things we’ve never done before, like going to a shooting range (which we always say we would go do, but don’t) or go zip lining. There are so many activities to do and we’re blessed enough to be able to splurge and invest in our marriage with these date nights.
We’re praying that we’re able to renew and refresh our marriage (hoping to bring our adventurous and spontaneous sides back), learn more about each other and what God has in store for our marriage. I want to win and invest in us, so that Satan has no loopholes or cracks he can get into, to destroy something God has so beautifully created. It’s not only going to make an impact on Leng and I, but the kids too. They’ll see the importance of dating after marriage and how to treat their future spouses. We have to be the example of how God describes marriage to be in Ephesians 5:22-30 (The Message):
Wives, understand and support your husbands in ways that show your support for Christ. The husband provides leadership to his wife the way Christ does to his church, not by domineering but by cherishing. So just as the church submits to Christ as he exercises such leadership, wives should likewise submit to their husbands. Husbands, go all out in your love for your wives, exactly as Christ did for the church – a love marked by giving, not getting. Christ’s love makes the church whole. His words evoke her beauty. Everything he does and says is designed to bring the best out of her, dressing her in dazzling white silk, radiant with holiness. And that is how husbands ought to love their wives. They’re really doing themselves a favor – since they’re already “one” in marriage. No one abuses his own body, does he? No, he feeds and pampers it. That’s how Christ treats us, the church, since we are part of his body.
I hope that you’ll also commit to weekly date nights with your spouse. It could transform your marriage and family! Go for it, it’s COMPLETELY worth it!